Most men and women who enter into a new relationship often want to spend each and every minute together. They want to be with each other for as long as possible. They want to chat all night, date every day and have sleepovers every weekend. But all of this time spent together can sometimes come at the expense of: other relationships, work, business, friends, family and personal time. When you finally have a second alone, you realize that you haven't spoken to your mother or best friend in a while, and possibly begin to questions your relationship itself. This might be the moment when you begin to ask yourself, how much time is too much time with my boyfriend? Is there a limit of how long you should be spending together? and how much space should you give to yourself and your partner? Well, keep reading, because we will tell you here at oneHOWTO.
A balanced relationship
While trying to figure out how much time you should spend with your boyfriend, you need to find a middle point between too much and too little. Finding this balance is much harder than one would expect. You will feel strongly about wanting to spend all the time with your newly found love interest. You will crave each and every opportunity to be with him and most likely miss him in his absence. This time you spend together is crucial for cultivating your relationship and keeping you both interested in each other. But life has its own demands too. You need to give due attention to your: office, work projects, friends and family too. Therefore, you need to enforce a realistic limit on how much time you would be spending together.
Don’t compromise your career, ambitions and passions for the sake of a new relationship. Your boyfriend should be mature enough to understand what you want and therefore cooperate with you. In fact, he probably has his own demands too. Encourage him to pursue them while at the same time giving due attention to your relationship.
You need to pay attention to the amount of time you spend with your boyfriend, compared to the time you spend with your family and friends. When you are in a relationship, your availability to a pre-existing relationship is forced to change. As you increase the time you spend with your boyfriend, you are more likely to decrease the amount of time you would spend with your best friend. When your friends start complaining that you don’t stay in touch with them anymore or when your family starts wondering where you are: then you need to quickly find a balance between the amount of time you spend with both.
Apart from the time you spend with your friends and family, you need to also spend some time alone. Use this alone time to think about your new relationship and create some sweet memories with yourself. You can also use this time alone to work on yourself or start a new hobby. The most important thing in having a healthy relationship is being comfortable and sure of yourself as a person, remember this!
Am I spending too much time with my boyfriend?
Do you want to know if you are spending too much time with your boyfriend, here are a few signs to look out for:
- You feel the need to stay in contact 24/7: He just dropped you at off home after a day-long date and you are already planning to meet for dinner.But either way, you still feel the need to constantly stay in touch through calls or messages. Do you keep tagging him in posts and checking all of his updates on Instagram? Now that communication is so easy, through cellphones and social media, it is very easy to stay in contact all of the time. This constant contact however is not healthy and can prove to be detrimental to a relationship. This is because it is human nature to need space, if you make each other feel claustrophobic, it can eventually end in a break up. Take a break, switch your phone off at night, read a book! There is no need to send a message the minute you have said bye to each other. Don't forget to live your life just because you cannot stop looking at your phone.
- You influence his relationship with his friends: It is common that people often think their partner’s friend are a bad influence on them. Despite what you think of your boyfriends friends, never discourage him from seeing them! His friends are his friends, relationships are between you and him, not his friends. You do not want to come across as possessive. If you believe you have a good reason to dislike his friends, then, the best thing you can do is to discuss this with your boyfriend and tell him what is worrying you.
- You want him to love you 24/7: Do you constantly ask your boyfriend does if he loves you? if he misses you? does he like you? what does he like about you? Asking these question constantly can become a little irritating for the receiving partner. Asking him these questions constantly can come across as if you did not believe him the first time he said it. You need to understand that if he is in a relationship with you, he obviously likes you and wants to be with you. Let him show his affection through his actions, which prove to most often be stronger than words. You need to remember that people show love in different ways. For example; some people may come across as very loving while others not, this is normal.
- You are ALWAYS together: Can you remember the last time you weren't together ? Understand that absence can actually make your heart grow fonder. It is important to give each other a chance to miss each other, this will allow you to appreciate each other more when you are together.
- You are cutting yourself out from the world: If you have isolated yourself from all other relationships, then perhaps you are spending too much time with each other. In addition to your boyfriend, you need to connect with your: family, friends and workplace. Neglecting them may result in future regret. So, grab the opportunities to spend more time with the other people in your life. When you are able to keep up with your friends and relationships, you might begin to see that you in fact feel more content and fulfilled with your new boyfriend. Believe me, your boyfriend will also appreciate that you are able to live your own life, are independent, where your life doesn't revolve around him.
What do experts say about relationships?
According to experts, seeing each other 2-3 times in a week is more than sufficient. If you are meeting more than that, then perhaps you are spending too much time together. Spending 5 out of 7 days with each other is way too much and might be interfering with your privacy and other obligations.
Keep a balance between your boyfriend and your own obligations. Give due attention to your: family, friends, career and personal life too. If your boyfriend is not able to understand your individuality, then perhaps he is not worth it, and isn't the right person for you.
If you want to read similar articles to How Much Time Is Too Much With My Boyfriend?, we recommend you visit our Sentimental relationships category.